12 months in advance
Determine your budget
Now it’s time to do the math and crunch some not-so-fun numbers. Before you can start planning, you need to figure out who’s paying for what and determine the cost of your wedding. Then, break down your budget—what’s a priority? What’s not?—and start allocating funds accordingly. (A little market research goes a long way here.) And since these numbers will change as you plan, it’s a good idea to create a detailed spreadsheet from the start. This way, you can keep track of your expenses and easily adjust the numbers over time.
Create a guest list
If only you could invite everyone, right? You probably can’t, so you need to set a cap on the invitations. When deciding on the number of guests, consider your budget (how much can you afford?) and the venue (how many people will it accommodate?). Also, who’s paying for what? Then consider how you’ll divide the list. If you and your partner are footing the bill, assume you’ll get 70 percent of the invitations, while each set of parents splits the remaining 30 percent. But if mom and dad are contributing, give everyone involved—your parents, your partner’s parents, and you as a couple—a third each. Next, it’s crunching, negotiating, and crunching until you reach a final number.
Hire a wedding planner
Again, it depends on your budget . (Fair warning: A lot of it depends.) But if your budget allows—or if your peace of mind depends on it—now is the time to hire your big day manager. This person will be your right-hand man (or woman) and will guide you through every decision, from choosing the venue to monitoring the budget to handling all the logistics.
Decide on formalities and the overall theme
Now it’s time to sit down with your partner and have another heart-to-heart talk. After all, the vibe of your wedding needs to be a joint decision between the two guests of honor. To get the conversation started, pour a glass of wine/water/tea and ask yourself: What’s important to you and why? What do you value? Also, consider that your venue—more on that below—will influence all of this. (Because in most cases, we’d advise against a glamorous, black theme for a barn wedding.)
Select the venue
Okay, so you know who you’re marrying. Now the only question is, where? Trust us: Choosing a venue is one of the most important decisions you’ll make at this moment. Seriously, the location influences almost everything else, from the number of guests invited to the type of flowers on the table. It’s also probably the biggest chunk of change you’ve ever put on the table. That’s why you should explore your options, visit the top contenders, and ultimately choose a place that suits your guest count, your style, and your budget. (Here are the best venues we would recommend again and again.) When choosing your venue, forget the list of pros and cons and trust your gut—this decision is about how you feel when you’re there. Besides the wedding venue, this spot would also work for a corporate party .